I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
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