just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
