so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Rumble strips road head = magical
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize