I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
