Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
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