Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
