what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
