Kiss
Puke
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Randomize
