I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
