lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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