i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
