I like to think it a success when the cops are called
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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