No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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