While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
