I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize