That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
