are you still at the devil's house?
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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