We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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