Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
