there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
