I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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