Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize