I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
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