have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
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