Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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