so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Randomize
