you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
