We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize