I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Randomize
