I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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