Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
