He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
