I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
