Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
this hospital has no fireball
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
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