he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize
