Who did Billy Mays play for?
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
You're like the curious george of whores
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
