and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
