My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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