dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I am naked and annoyed.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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