would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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