Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
so explain again why im purple
no
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Randomize
