You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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