The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Randomize