It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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