My nipple is on Facebook.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
