i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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