Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
