So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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