Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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