Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
